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Stupid Girl

I feel so pissed off right now. And disappointed. And meh

David picked me up from Dads tonight about midnight, because he was taking his friend Chrissy and her friend down to Liquid in Windsor. He had to pick them up later, which was fine, he was like yeh come along if you want. And I thought yeh why not, don't actually know what Liquid's like, and except for the centre Windsor's nice to drive through. We sat down by the river for a while, naming random swans that swam past hehehe. And then about 2 we drove down to pick them up

This was where all the problems began. They eventually came out of the club at almost 3, and they were both really drunk (as expected, not so good as they're only 17), especially Chrissys friend. She just mumbled into her phone most of the way back, then passed out. Chrissy wanted to go see her boyfriend, so we had to stop off in Pooley Green for like 20 minutes. By now it was 3.30am. So then we drove back to hers (she lives 5 bloody minutes away from me), and David carried her friend inside, and 5 minutes later came back out. The friend is throwing up everywhere, and so they're gonna take her to the hospital to see if she needs her stomach pumped. I mean for fucks sake. What a stupid kid

First of all, she's probably just drunk and I doubt she needs her stomach pumped - they'll probably get there and she'll have stopped throwing up and will have fallen asleep. And second of all, David hasn't stayed round here at all this week, where I've been ill, and I was really looking forward to it, to curling up together and waking up with him in the morning. And now I bet we can't do that, because they'll be there ages, and he'll just go home to sleep, which is fair enough, I don't blame him. But it's crap =(

But he always does the right thing, that's why I love him. He's so loyal, always makes sure other people are ok. That's why I'm not with them, he wouldn't let me go, because I'm tired, and still a bit ill. He told me in the car outside just now that he loves me. I didn't say it back, because I don't know if he meant to say it, and it kind of took me by surprise to be honest. And now I feel terrible, what if he's really hurt that I didn't say it? Because I think I do. I've been thinking it lately, but I didn't want to say it so soon, after only 2 months, and risk making myself look like some kind of crazy obsessive girlfriend or something. Except I did want to say it, well, I do. I always have trouble saying it though, to anyone. My Mum, Dan, Sticky - all these people and I can write it in a message, but saying it out loud has always been a problem. I just can't really do it, I don't know why, it's ridiculous. It's just 3 words. But I want to mean them when I say it, you know? Not just use them for no good fucking reason. But even when I mean it, and want to say it, it gets stuck in my throat somehow. I don't know whats wrong with me =(

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Polly Prissy Pants

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